When men and women display the same behaviours in, say, a workplace, men are much more likely to be called assertive confident, powerful or a strong leader, while women get this list. Have you ever heard a man called a gossip? Yesterday event at work: Him: Hes a son-of-a-bitch. Amicable - She is friendly and cares about the needs of others. Remember this pyramid? Thats one I get a lot also Co -dependent. When was the last time youve seen a man labeled nurturing or co-dependent? When I was a little kid at infant school I was unkindly labelled spitfire because I had a strong personality and lots of energy, and I stood up for myself. Shrill. Dont mention her young children unless you would also mention his, or describe her clothes unless you would describe his, or say shes shrill or attractive unless the same adjectives would be applied to a man. Trophy Wife Image description: Persona A: It was just a joke! Then I opened my eyes and took a good hard look at the world. I really do think we must stop fighting and demanding equality. 2023. People need to respect an individual and their life experience and adhere to my clear boundaries about how to treat me with respect and consideration for my feelings. Thank you. Find 14 ways to say BOSS LADY, along with antonyms, related words, and example sentences at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. cocky. I cant think that Ive heard it of a man, except for groups and teams: a spirited defence. Also, men havent been oppressed for centuries!!! Stuck-up I will never listen to a two year old small child in any adults body getting very upset and aggressive with me. And a few months ago a friend labelled me as bossy. Baby-hater (or any implication that working females hate kids) The most commonly used positive term to describe men was analytical, while for women it was compassionate. Though the comments they make may not overtly come across as really blatant offenses, they are still insulting. I dont recall hearing of many handsome paintings, for example. Invite others to join in 9. I could probably list pages, and pages, of these words. When letters make sounds that aren't associated w One goose, two geese. I feel its my duty as the majority of the doctors who treat me are younger than me. Love the quote at the beginning too, especially People die, are refused healthcare, or suffer attack as a result of gender . I am sorry you missed that point! The "Ban Bossy Campaign" led by Sheryl Sandberg (COO of Meta Platforms Inc, formerly Facebook, Founder of LeanIn.org) in 2014 criticises the word 'bossy' to describe Assertive Girls and Women . This one is newish, and seems to be used mostly by women applying it to themselves, and each other, without pejorative or patronising intention, but I reckon it can go either way. I think my first step is to share this on my (recently revived) and see how that does. Much food for thought to discuss in my positive relationships lesson with 14-15 year students next week. Another lad from sixth form who asked me out accused me of being snooty when I said I didnt fancy him, and then went and told all his friends that I refused to date him because I was vain and thought I was better than him! At the other extreme, the most commonly used negative term to describe men was. So its a good thing weve got other words for that kind of bossy, too, she notes. 1. But we deal with them as inevitable facts. But the core dynamic will still be there, damn Im ranting, anyway, I liked your comment. And doesntthe act of writing for all the world to see sound less brave and revolutionary when you slap a label on it like mummy blog? Thanks for the enriching piece of writing! This is true equality in action. Good. It is important to mature from 20th centuary concept of feminism and ways of dealing with it as it can harm and keep us stuck in unintentional models of patriarchy that is unfair to both men and women and the generations they are raising. Thank you for helping me to see through this new lens my own complicity in the life-limiting system of patriarchy. Lifestyle; Real Life; 20 words we only use to describe women. Fantastic list! Arrogant I had another creepy bunch of colleagues in the NHS (a bunch of Nurses!) I want to see and this needs to be). Lady lumps Excellent article. Airhead, n. Usually refers to someone, male or female, who is simple-minded and vapid. Sugar tits Id rather embrace it and be open about it, not deny what I cant control. Lay off! Now, Ill let you know that I am an academic, well-educated woman who has held down a career, and has now returned to University to do postgraduate study (the only person in my immediate family to do this). Stroppy. Yet all of them consider stereotypically male interests like football, rugby, cricket and computer games to be acceptable, and do not insult them! Strong women, or alpha females, are exactly that: strong women who are incredible leaders, with alpha traits that are inherently a part of who she is and come across in everything she does. Getty Rachel, a seasoned executive in the natural resources industry, got promoted to an important role in. (this from a person who learned medical terminology as part of training to be a medical office assistant, and again later in training to be a pharmacist). Dont say she has no professional training but he worked his way up. Man of the House. Successful females are calculating, successful men are smart. Not how differently I started to view other women (for that had been thewhole point of the exercise)but how differently I started to view myself. And while you're at it, don't call them pushy, angry, brusque, ballbusters, bitchy, careerist, cold, calculating you get the point. (Im going on record with my hunch that shes a she.). 1. Thank you for this article! Words used to describe women: Fat Skinny Skinny-fat DitzFlakeHoeWhore ButterfaceSlut BossyBitchy Words that define a woman:None of the above I find it is much healthier to accept others as doing their best given their upbringing and experience. When my husband works from home he has his own business with no mention of the fact that hes a Dad.. We just deal with it as part of our reality. Pancake chest high and mighty. Ive lived it and its not something Id wish on anyone. When two groups of women are debating, lets call it debating, too. Interesting. Spirited. A good test of whether or not you as a reporter are taking sexism seriously is whether you would cite race, class, ethnicity, or religion in the same context. Actively participate in the initiative 8. How a Racist Insult Inspired the Very Asian Foundation, Project Dandelion Spreads the Seeds for Climate Justice, National Womens History Museum Exhibit Opens at MLK Library, Creating Ways to Celebrate Kindness with the Runway of Hope. It's unfortunately all too common for us to hear these words used to describe womenand only womenwhile other words, like driven or committed, are used to describe men. Ooh I needed this. Im pretty sure sensitive, co-dependent, and drama queen are used for both genders. You speak about a society and nation, but dont identify your own. In fact, there are many better, more accurate ways to describe women and girls than bossy, according to a recent BlogHer post by Julie Ross Godar. Theres nothing wrong with these words in themselves, but research on the references people write for graduates (see below) has shown that they are more often used for women than for men, who are more likely to get words of more ringing endorsement like excellent, accomplished or successful. Also, you might like to join us here (BEST PLACE ON THE INTERNETS): https://www.facebook.com/groups/BrilliantAmazingWritersMothers/. Maybe you could add a section on things we do ourselves without realising it. Im so glad were finally calling this language out. Shes an economist and a brilliant writer. Your joke contributes to a culture of violence. Pyramid of five layers: 1: the top, pinnacle = murder; 2: rape, sexual assault, physical, emotional and financial abuse; 3: harassment, threats and verbal abuse; 4: traditional roles, glass ceiling, rigid gender-based stereotypes, 5: sexist/homophobic/transphobic jokes, problematic language, objectification. Like a girl (run like a girl, throw like a girl). Mosquito bites Moose You tell it as it is because you know you're telling the truth. SHE cannot even bear to MENTION THE FACT I AM DOING POSTGRADUTE STUDY! They were not expected to direct activities and lead the group. 4. I came upon it while searching for guidance in addressing a colleague who refers to me as supermom (sigh). Language makes a difference in how we think and act, and we can train ourselves to stop using words with negative connotations, too many of which are focused on women. Now, mainly thanks to the media it's come to be synonymous with this type of woman, who aspires to dye her hair yellow (If you've read Bossypants you'll understand why I used yellow and not blonde) with extensive knowledge about celebrity life. My father insultingly called my interest in English Literature piss assed and arty-farty, whilst clearly showing a preference for stereotypically male topics like football. When I really looked at it, I thought the guy is a degenerate loser. Benevolent - She makes decisions that benefit others more than herself. How other people choose to dressis none of anyone elses damn business. If you call a man emasculated you are actually blaming WOMEN for doing this to him. For more on this, I really love Andie Foxs practice: A little while ago while sitting on the beach I realised how good I am at picking faults in womens bodies, my own included of course but thats not really so surprising because I know my own body very well and Ive been living in a misogynist world, oh all my life. Avoiding gender bias in reference writing, women being called bossy and men powerful, What Scott Morrison fails to understand about how divorce affects women, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whataboutism, http://women.govt.nz/work-skills/income/gender-pay-gap, 5 Tips to Boost the Connection in Your Parent Child Relationship, The Ninety-Seventh Down Under Feminists Carnival | Zero at the Bone, Campus Question February 19, 2017 | BPI Campus, The world I would give my daughter - My Flatpack Life, http://sacraparental.com/2016/05/14/everyday-misogyny-122-subtly-sexist-words-women/, 3.1 Further Research | Madison Hunt | Ihi Wehi, Eros and the irrelevance of #Me Too against Capitalist+Theist immorality The Eros Principle, Secondary Research for the short film A2 Media Advanced Portfolio, 8 Essential Tips for Supporting a Pregnant Partner, 101 Christian Women Speakers to Discover in New Zealand, Gentle Parenting Tips: 26 Things to Say to Kids Instead of Stop, Dont and Other Commands, Advent with Kids: 76 Ideas for Getting Ready for Advent, The Undoing, or Hard Times Are Much Easier When Youre Rich, Gentle Parenting Tips: 26 Things to Say to Kids Instead of 'Stop', 'Don't' and Other Commands, 13 Fabulous Kids' TV Shows that Pass the Maisy Test and Have Other Great Features, Too, Co-sleeping Converts #3: Sleep-crawling and Other Challenges, Not Only a Father #2: God as Mother in the Bible, 9 Ways to Give Thanks or 'Say Grace' at Mealtimes, The Sacrament of Breastfeeding #4: Mary and Jesus, Peter Gray's 6 Conditions for Self-Directed Learning: Education and Schooling #15, these words are used disproportionately oftenagainst women. My participation in the hatred of womens bodies had been every bit a form of self-hatred. The only reason I can think of that she does this is because I am a lot thinner than her! Stop using these words, eh? If you want to understand why, read this article: http://sacraparental.com/2016/05/14/everyday-misogyny-122-subtly-sexist-words-women/. Whats less obvious is that they are sexist, for two key reasons: Heres some more context for this, again from Dotty Winters: A 2014 study for Fortune.com by Kieran Snyder examined 248 reviews from 180 people, (105 men and 75 women). I know loveable curmudgeons but Ive never heard of a loveable harridan. It just means the mother is an a-hole. My husband on the other hand can talk about his career until the cows come home and they hang on every word he is the great breadwinner. If you insultingly say a man is effeminate you compare him to FEMALES and imply that this makes him somehow an object of ridicule. You dont make any sense. He went on to accuse me of expecting everyone to conform to my way of thinking. Bird Thanks! It wasnt anything to do with that actually, in fact my husband and I were very lucky to have our one child due to medical reasons but we rightfully didnt let anyone know this none of their business. He has accused me of being Hormonal, and often tries to imply that I am premenstrual when actually I am annoyed at him because he has done something wrong or said something stupid. Cankles, Insulting sexist medical (or pseudo-medical) terms: What is surprising is peoples inability to understand that. Abrasive. We can care about the language we use and still fight human rights abuses in Myanmarandchild marriage around the world. Its true. Im taking an educated guess here, but I think the Bible was written by males, from a male point of view. I appreciate both the article and comments. Why do you care? Person B: Sexual violence exists on a pyramid. If we need to speak about poor behaviour, lets choose words that are not unfairly gendered. You are welcome to write one about words like macho and effeminate. The words bossy is typically used as an insult to get girls and women to shut up and sit down. It is sad that you get so mixed up in the points you want to make, by talking about valuing people for themselves, but then wrongly accusing Feminists of not valuing the home. You can leave your suggestions, vote for what the next article will be, and make my writing possible. Aggressive. "One ex-housemate, who did not want to be named, described him as a man who was difficult to get along with, very bossy and imposing.". Lets try to take people on their own terms without making assumptions about how they feel about kids. Gold Digger. Also: shrill and strident, both of which imply high-pitched and. There are certainly some here that I have not considered before and will update my list accordingly. When I managed people, I had to do countless interviews, evaluations, etc. I was repulsedby myself. 6. She has also insinuated that I emasculate her son. ), Heart-breaker (and any other words that sexualise little kids, suggesting they are into romance orsex when theyre only four years old. Or should that be EXicon? Also, how do we get this demeaning language out of movies and shows? For example, I worked in a Hospital as a Social Worker and my boss was a MALE NURSE. I dont think anyones trying to ignore bad behavior, by banning use of the word bossy, Godar says. Upon reading this article, I was saddened to see what this society has come to. We can challenge and vent all we like but will it ever change? Robert, Im afraid you are incorrect in a few of your assumptions here, and missing a few points. Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. So bossy was a way to cast a woman as unfeminine and unnatural. Thats illegal. On this page you'll find 35 synonyms, antonyms, and words related to bossy, such as: imperious, overbearing, pushy, authoritarian, commanding, and controlling. Active Adaptable Adventurous Affable Amiable Amicable Amusing Brave Bright Calm Careful Charming Circumspect Communicative Compassionate Conscientious Considerate Courageous Courteous Creative Determined Diligent Diplomatic Discreet Dynamic Empathetic Energetic Faithful Fearless Friendly Funny Generous Gentle Good Gregarious Helpful Honest Hopeful Anyone who is involved in giving performance appraisals, mentoring people or otherwise evaluating and describing human beings as a job, might want tostick this advice to journalists from Gloria Steinem on their walls (feel free to copy it and pop it in someones in-tray): The most workable definition of equality for journalists is reversibility. My self estim went down, I nearly wanted to suicide. I dont hate men, and I dont see anything in this article that suggests I do. After all, if this is what you expect, then one has to ask whether YOU respect other peoples boundaries, etc. Just before we get to them, I wanted to mention that Ive just started aPatreonaccount. This means that he/she is friendly or able to receive others. Learn a new word every day. Hooters I had time off work due to these symptoms, and was told by my MALE NURSE BOSS, Why cant you take an aspirin? Free thesaurus definition of words used to describe bossy and interfering people from the Macmillan English Dictionary - a free English dictionary online with thesaurus and with pronunciation from Macmillan Education. Selfish career-woman People are often surprised when I raise issues of discrimination in the church. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Post was not sent - check your email addresses! Menstrual blues A British actress is the latest high profile woman slam . Dismiss it as nonsense! I suppose curmudgeon is the male version but I still cringe over harridan. I was in tears whilst reading this article that was how moving your words were. Neither of my parents is University educated, and my younger brother went to University not once, but TWICE, and quit/failed BOTH times without actually completing his degree. Or, maybe, I have just met bad examples? NOBODY other than that person, and their spouse/partner, should get to have a say in this. Dont say shes had facial surgery unless you say he dyes his hair or has hair plugs. Should we spend ourtime on something more important? [Read more in theThe Womens Media Centers Media Guide to Gender Neutral Coverage of Women Candidates and Politicians, by Rachel Joy Larris and Rosalie Maggio, available as a PDF. Interestingly, Lerner points out that although anger is a natural emotion shared by both males and females, angry is an insulting term to describe WOMEN, but rarely if ever men. Feminism is neither a dying cause, nor one that is doing more harm than good. As if rising in a chosen endeavor is trickery and subterfuge for a female, but aptitude and perseverance for a male. Grow up I think accepting people as they are and educate with heart using masculine and feminine aspects of ourselves is helpful. Some dont. Yes, the whole calm down discourse is definitely a sexist one. Colours are for everyone. Double-standards: These words punish women for behaviour that is acceptable from men These words are used against women who have ideas and opinions and are confident in expressing them Bossy. What would make your list? Great list! Engage in the needs assessment 7. She had that workload because those above her knew just how effective she was but didnt want their balls to shrink by acknowledging it. Hi, could you tell me which way to the cafe? Your article caused me to consider how I encourage the use of the divine feminine. Thank you. Im glad you have had the pleasant experience of never being abused. They were not expected to direct activities and lead the group. I was accused of bleating while trying to explain why it may be inappropriate for men to fundraise for a hospital by doing a bed push dressed as female nurses Nglish: Translation of bossy for Spanish Speakers. Seriously. ), Insulting names for female body parts (makes me want to vomit if somebody talks about bodies this way): Women experience a lot of pressure in the realm of child-bearing. Godar points out that a woman may actually engage in a variety of bad behaviors at work. By the way, I have my own personal experience of this subtly denigrating language, and sadly most of it was aimed at my by people I should be able to call my nearest and dearest my family, friends and workplace colleagues. The same happened to me. A ball-buster. or might compare women to sub-human animals, such as bitch, chick, dog, cow, horse, pig, porker. Long time reader, first time commenter Reading your posts always takes me so long because I have to follow so many links and I get all distracted and dont come back to comment. Business owner. This is the favourite term of disparagement in my workplace towards any female manager who has a vision she wants to implement. When we see our family, I am not allowed to talk about my career. Or as theyre usually known, men? Actually she was highly intelligent and accomplished beyond belief and her mind just raced forward and she didnt have time for bullshit because of her enormous workload. Oh good! ), Pretty (Im just suggesting that if you use this, its not the first thing you say, or the thing you say most often to a child. Arent I a good girl for thinking of this. Pushy/Assertive. Faced with these atrocities it can feel petty to gently challenge the unequal use of the word abrasive but the same system perpetuates both behaviours and its all based on the same flawed logic. Another medical tern Boggy uterus. Does she always insist on having her own way? Earlier today, I suggested an alternate solution to a coworker. And no the Bible was written by GOD, cough coughshort men cough cough. Belongs to the 'ambitious', 'abrasive' and 'bossy' family. I felt hurt and offended on behalf of my sisters but I didnt want to sound preachy so I said nothing. Theyre hiding behind saying others are being politically correct (thats a bad thing to them). Accessed 1 May. Many thanks! Working mother is a tricky one. As we start to attribute characteristics as more male or more female this is where the challenges. Its commonplace to come across feminists inventing new, creative ways to feel offended, and its SO damaging. 11. I live in New Zealand, and I would definitely not describe it as hypersensitive to offence. Im going to link this on a piece Im writing Im working on about rape culture, a term, that as a man, I had to look up and figure out how it applied to me and to our culture. They also do not change the way I am addressed. Pingback: Words for women | Clare Flourish. It is never appropriate for someone to be around anger if they do not want to be. Honestly I dont feel like it ever will change, its down to the basic fact that women have been systematicly oppressed and controlled because they have allot of power, and if you dont control them hard, most men wouldnt have a chance. Another opinion here, though.). Im a little surprised MILF didnt make the list. However in more enlighten circles of people, lots of equality is currently happening, more confident men that know there value are much less threatened by women and value the equal companionship. But first: is she being unreasonable, or is she just disagreeing with you? This is basic self respect. Its so so so hard to swim against the tide. Women were traditionally supposed to be nurturing and supportive and to help the group. Step-by-step guide to Gender Equality Training Preparation phase 1. Ive had this conversation a lot, particularly latelymy father is having a hard time processing the #metoo movement and all it entails. And, I definitely no, that we do get moody and emotional. Race, gender, and sexual orientation are legally protected classes for a reason. Just like all the male haters of Ellen. A new way you can give me time to write this kind of article is through Patreon. They do not. Besides, it should be a PERSONAL CHOICE, irrespective of gender, as to whether a person wants a career, or wants to stay at home and raise babies. Men are denying sexist terminology even when it is blatant swearing. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Ive added most of the suggestions to this list, though Ive omitted a great number of the direct insults that we can all recognise as sexist (even if some peoplethink they are acceptable for use.). Respect and understanding is key. I was highly academic, but got labelled swot and teachers pet. Jezebel I was reading a book recently and came across the term planted his seed in her. That is why i left my ex, he was constantly putting me down and maked macho comment. This is what I think: the world would be a better place if everyone stopped talking about and to women like this, especially ifits because theyre identifying and eradicatingtheir own, sometimes unconscious, sexism. That book really opened my eyes and changed my thinking and behaviour If they yell, we call it robust, or heated. In reading this I realise that if you expect bitchiness surely that is what youll experience. Oh shes lovely is basically like saying oh she knows her place.. Id add calculating to this list. Not really. If you dont think this happens during the hiring process, then you either conveniently fail to notice because you benefit from said system or youve never worked in a hiring capacity before. I say just embrace it. I love it! He told me not to get worked up. Id add that somewhere on the list. I like how you comment really gets to the meat of the matter. Pingback: Campus Question February 19, 2017 | BPI Campus. It happens in our so-called enlightened nations, too. One moose, two moose. someone who is bossy keeps telling other people what to do, in a way that annoys them, telling people what to do and refusing to listen to their opinions, deliberately involving yourself in other peoples lives and trying to influence the way that they behave, although you have no right to do this, an overbearing person always tries to control other peoples behaviour and ignores their opinions and feelings, trying to control other people and make them obey you, telling people what to do without caring what they think, frequently asking or telling someone to do something in a way that annoys them, involving yourself in situations that you have no right to be involved in, becoming involved in something in a way that is not welcome, always criticizing someone, or always telling them to do things, showing that you are used to being obeyed or expect to be obeyed, expecting other people to work very hard and carefully, confident and expecting to be obeyed and respected by people, informal giving advice or telling people how to behave, in a way that is annoying, stating what should happen, or what someone should do, informal extremely determined to get what you want, even if it annoys other people. I looked at the woman at work who was described as a bitch. It seems that Nurses can be extraordinarily sexist, despite their so-called training. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Women Connect4Good, Inc. All Rights Reserved. I know straight men who call themselves drama queens all the time. Alpha female traits manifest in her career, personal life, hobbies, friendships pretty much every facet of her life. Except for Mary the Virgin: she was a good girl. eh. J.C. Social norms are cultural, but he doesnt see how he is a part of and influence on that culture as a whole. Great list, I am currently doing a design project on language and feminism focusing on the way we use just.
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